(Photo credit: My dear friend Renée P. took this in Italy- it’s my last name, but not my house.)
I’m online dating houses to move into in Los Angeles with my family. It’s pretty funny, well it would be if there were no stress.
It feels similar to online dating for love, sex, companionship and hopefully a feeling of being home someday.
Just like regular dating, the photos you first see of the house are often not what the house really looks like in person.
Sometimes you meet the perfect guy (house) and you feel so hopeful, until you realize the house has a fatal flaw or some reason it would never work.
I’m trying to look at it as exciting! Every day a new adventure! But it’s very bizarre.
One three bedroom two bathroom townhouse rental we went to look at, in a great school district, was being shown by a young male real estate agent.
Let’s call him Douchey McRealtor.
We show up at 10:30 am on a weekday morning, our appointed time, to view the property. It’s supposed to be a one year lease that is about $4,000 per month.
As my husband and I park our car on the street, we see a woman standing in front of the house. We park, smile and approach her, thinking she must be working with the real estate company.
No, she’s there to see the house to rent, too.
This is a little awkward, but not as awkward as when six other people arrive. We’re all standing there when D. McRealtor drives up late.
It’s some kind of a gang viewing, and no one was told. Douchey treats us like cattle and does not introduce himself to any of us personally.
Instead, he announces loudly that he will show the place now to anyone looking to lease. It turns out that two of the elderly women there are looking to buy this property, as part of the entire house.
In other words, we’re being shown a rental that might sell right out from under us while we live there.
On we go into the back part of the house, up the stairs to the townhouse.
The first thing we see upon entering the abode is a possibly dead human being, a young girl in her late teens or early 20′s, out cold on the couch.
Her arms and legs are splayed akimbo. Continue reading