(Warning: This is partially a poo post.)
My four year old son is a gorgeous, smart, funny, talented and athletic child- full of charisma and spirit- but unfortunately, he is just not grossed out by germs.
Let’s review the recent cringe worthy evidence (I haven’t seen the movie “Contagion,” but it sounds like my monkey is starring in it):
1.) Yesterday after preschool his teacher took us aside and said that our child not only stuck his hand in the potty to play in the toilet water (again)…
2.) He also found a shart (my word, not the teacher’s) in his butt, stuck his finger in it and then showed the poo to the other kids. Mommy is so proud!
And worst of all…
3.) …He spit on another boy in class. Gee, I really hope my sweet hearted angel is not the school bully.
4.) After coming home and a good talking to, we put Bex in a pull-up because he usually goes #2 when he gets home and our pediatrician said it’s fine if he’s sometimes still scared of going #2 on the potty.
Boys his age are wary of it sometimes, it’s not that uncommon, she said.
(Sidebar: My kiddo does not ever really poop at school. He waits, yesterday was just a small accident. We think we let him eat too much crunchy roasted seaweed. Fiber. It was green.
Never mind.
He goes to school in Thomas the Train “big boy” underwear” and uses the toilet to pee, along with the other munchkins. TMI?)
So back to yesterday afternoon. We put him in the pull-up and he’s watching his educational cartoons.
A minute or two later, my husband and I were in our office working when Bex casually walked in with no pants on, holding his pull-up in his hand, now with a poop deposited in it.
Ahhh…the glamorous life!
5.) Bex will also drink rainwater out of a dirty puddle in our backyard, or out of a kid’s bucket he’s been using to dig to China in the dirt.
He’ll stroll inside the house and fill the crusty dirty plastic bucket with water from the sink and try to drink it like it’s Evian from a refreshing mountain spring.
All of this, I hope, will be good for his immune system someday. Maybe when the killer virus comes, he’ll be able to save us all. Then by God, it’ll all be worth it, when his green sharts make my baby a world hero.
Green power! It’s eco-friendly, right?
Errr…let’s just forget this ever happened.
XOXO-
~ Heidi
Hey! I know you’ve been nominated before, but I like your blog, so I’m nominating you again!! You’re a Verstatile Blogger! http://saraellenawesome.com/2011/09/29/the-versatile-blogger-award/
http://www.saraellenawesome.com
Hey Sara,
Thank you so much!
My goodness.
http://www.charitywoosely.com
How much do I adore childhood poo stories? SO DAMN MUCH. I had no brothers, only a sister, and she had three girls before I had my first son, so in how many ways was I unprepared for three boys?
EVERY SINGLE WAY POSSIBLE.
Since I’m all about the over-share, I’m going to hand you this one:
When my youngest son, Brennan, was 3, he went to a little friend’s house for a play-date. How proud was I when I got a phone call from the other little boys mother telling me I needed to come pick Brennan up and bring him a fresh change of clothing INCLUDING SHOES because while they were outside playing, Bren’s little friend pooped in a hole they had dug in the backyard. They both were fascinated by the poo, enough to poke it with sticks, pick it up and hold it, step on it, squish it, and basically do everything with it except eat it.
Good times.
I had to throw his little multi-colored baby Weeboks away because poop? Does not ever, EVER come out of Weeboks. Ever.
(You tell me your poop story, I tell you mind. I’m a giver.)
xoxo
http://www.deathbycupcakes01.blogspot.com
P.S. I know I’ve told you this before, but Bexon is just too precious for words. Love his little face!!!
http://www.deathbycupcakes01.blogspot.com
Love your poo story! It’s a good thing they’re cute, man.
One day I walked into the living room, and my then 4 year old middle daughter was sitting on the floor pulling skittles out of the folds of her little “gina” and feeding them to her three year old sister. They are 14 and 15 now, and they start shooting me the stink eye if I even say the word skittle! Kids dont get a “gross meter” until five or six, I think.
Oh my goodness. Have I told you before that your blog makes me laugh so hard sometimes that tears stream out of my eyes?
Whew, I need to g0 fix my makeup!
http://www.cowardlyfeminist.com
Wendi,
I have never heard a Skittle ‘gina story and I am impressed!
Thank you, Vesta! I’m sure you look gorgeous.